Imperfect You In An Imperfect World

Image by Getty Images via Daylife

Are you controlling? By controlling I mean, do you feel compelled to control the outcome of every situation. It is stressful for you to feel that the situation is out of your control? Is it difficult for you to wait in a long? Does it drive you crazy to wait for a table in a restaurant?

The need to control the environment news can reflect low frustration tolerance. Frustration tolerance is something that we learned as a child. Some children's parents do not give them sufficient frustration to learn how to manage such feelings. The tension that comes with frustration is something to be avoided thanks rather than something to be tolerated.

Do you find yourself becoming angry when presented with a frustrating situation? Do you blame others for frustration that is beyond anyone's control? If so, you must examine the messages you give yourself. For instance, do you tell yourself that the tension is unbearable? Examine that thought. Is the tension unbearable or simply unpleasant? By telling yourself that it is unbearable, you are lessening your ability to manage the tension.

Sometimes, the effort to control emerges in perfectionism. You struggle to allow yourself to make mistakes. You punish yourself errors in judgment. In this case, the frustration comes from not being perfect. You have not learned to tolerate your own imperfections. Some folks go to great lengths to avoid any appearance of imperfection.

Whether you are tolerating an imperfect environment or your own imperfections, you must be able to accept that imperfections are part of everyday life. When you do this, you will find that the tension becomes more manageable and your mood is lighter.